When you first start planning your wedding you’ll probably start reading about the role of the registrar. Then, as you explore more and start thinking about making your wedding unique, you’ll come across the term Celebrant. But, what’s the actual difference?
Very simply, the registrar is employed by the authorities and can marry you in the eyes of the law, following their strictly controlled formula. A Celebrant is someone who is hired by you to make you wedding ceremony as unique and personal as you choose.
Some Key Differences
A Celebrant led wedding ceremony gives you the freedom to celebrate your wedding without restrictions – it’s your wedding, your way. We work together to create your perfect celebration. We get to know each other from the moment you make your enquiry and throughout the months, weeks and days leading up to your wedding.
This makes your wedding ceremony so much more unique and personal. As the Celebrant officiating your wedding service, through face-to-face meetings, Zoom meetings and my unique wedding questionnaire, I discover all about the two of you and what you want your dream wedding to be.
On the other hand, a registrar has a set formula for the ceremony. It fits into a 30- minute window and there is no room to personalise your vows or deviate from their order – although you can choose your own reading if you like.
Timing Is Everything
I recently officiated at a wedding at the beautiful Rowton Castle near Shrewsbury. The ceremony was to take place in the gardens. On arrival dark clouds hung over the castle, the heavens opened and it rained and rained for about an hour. The bride was so upset as her dream wedding was definitely an outdoor wedding. She watched as it seemed that dream would be shattered.
After about 10 minutes with all of us watching the rain and wondering how long we were going to have to wait, the photographer turned to me and asked if I was a Celebrant or a Registrar. “Why?” I asked. “If you are a Registrar, we are going to have to move the wedding indoors and the bride won’t get her dream wedding ceremony” he replied.
He went on to explain to the bride and groom that a Registrar is only booked for a 30-45 min time slot. “At least you can hang around because you don’t have another wedding to go to in the next hour” he said. Low and behold, after approximately an hour it stopped raining, the sun came out, the seats were wiped, sunshine swathed the gardens and the happy couple had the outdoor wedding of their dreams. Their wedding photographs were going to be perfect.
By choosing me, a Wedding Celebrant to officiate your service you have no time restraints, because I’m booked for the whole day. I can hang around until the weather is perfect for you, or that traffic jam your guests are in has been negotiated.
Spot The Difference
That bride and groom chose Rowton Castle to make their wedding memorable and unique to them. Isn’t that why you choose your wedding venue, because it has an ambiance that suits you and your partner.
Your wedding dress and colour scheme are unique. You choose them because they make you feel beautiful, make a statement about your dream wedding theme and say something about the two of you, your personalities and your love for each other.
Your cake, your flower girl dresses, your décor – you choose it all to suit your personality and wedding dream. It’s what makes your wedding a personal moment for both bride and groom. With a Celebrant led wedding you get to make the same personal choices about the ceremony itself. There are no other couples queuing outside with their family and friends to have the exact same wedding you just had. This day is completely you.
The Legal Stuff
Yes, the Registrar has a role. They have to do the legal side. And there are wedding venues licenced for a Registrar led wedding. Rowton Castle is one of them. But, remember that even then, there are only specific areas within the venue where that wedding can take place. The Registrar has to stick to their legally licensed square of the carpet or patio. Your Celebrant let wedding can take place under the trees, in the lounge or in the grand entrance. It’s your choice.
Do you still have to have the legal side? Yes, you do. But that doesn’t have to be a part of your ceremony and big day. Consider a birth. The parents pop down to the office to register the birth. The naming ceremony takes place at a different time and place where it becomes a celebration for all of the family and friends. A death is registered legally, yet the Celebration of Life happens at a different place and time too.
You can do the same with your wedding. Register it formally with a couple of friends as witnesses (there are normally several registry offices near to your postcode to choose from). Then hold you fabulous Wedding Day celebration where you choose and, more importantly, how you choose.
Your Vows
As your Celebrant, I create personal vows for you. They can be funny, ironic, have a faith theme, be pagan and include your favourite song, poem or reading from a special book. This makes your vows so very different to everyone else’s, like everything else about your wedding day.
I also create a unique service, telling your story and personalising it closely with you to create a unique wedding script. This is my art, taking your words, your story and sprinkling it with my magic word dust to give you, your family and friends a day you’ll never forget. It should be a story that starts with once upon a time and finishes with forever after.
For more advice on how to register your wedding, writing your vows and wedding story to create your dream wedding email me at info@denise-whelan-celebrant.com.
